[Si] TV

5. Benicio del Toro: In Benny's world his "crazy" is "cool," much like his "butt-ass ugly features" are "exotic and dark." How else could you explain the actor's romps with Heather Graham, Charlize Theron and Alicia Silverstone? At 2004's Oscars, he continued his blond ambition tour by allegedly hooking up with Scarlett Johansson in an elevator. Next up for Benny is his twin bill on El Che (Guerilla, The Argentine); one tip, though, stay away from the blanquitas it's not very revolutionary.

4. Residente of Calle 13: The Puerto Rock Eminem is always getting into trouble with his potty mouth. Even though music critics love his dexterous rhymes, others can't help but focus on his outlandish bars like, "Es por que usted tiene la cabeza cerra', cuadra' como un cubo / O puede ser que tiene un tubo atravezau pol c**o." When he's not using little people in his videos, he's pissing off his future in-laws in videos. His clip for "Tango del Pecado" infamously poked fun at his girlfriend's (Denise Quinones) father. Additionally, Rene always says he makes urban alternative music but always wins in the reggaeton category. Identity crisis or not, at least Ivy Queen is always there to scratch his back.

3. Noelia: Countless lad mags can't be wrong; this pop singer is indeed one of the finest boricua nenas from La Isla del Encanto. As of late she has made more music in the bedroom than in the studio booth-a sex tape of her and former beau Yamil hit the Web last year. She proceeded to up her crazy meter when she accused her stepfather of sexually abusing her but never actually filed a lawsuit. In another twist of events, her current manager/boyfriend, Jorge Reynoso, is the one who allegedly distributed her sex tape. Sexy girl + messed up family + creepy beau = a porn star or Noelia.

2. Jim Jones: Even though the former Dipset capo doesn't flaunt his half-boricuaness as he does his dirtiness, if used some soap and traded his rock getup for a guayavera he'll clearly be more Puerto Rican than a piragua. If nothing else Guillermo is one of the most entertaining personalities in hip-hop. He's like Lil' Wayne without the syrup addiction or the always useless superb lyricism. We knew Jimmy was off his rocker when he challenged rap demigod Jay-Z but when he began exchanging handshakes with 50 Cent, a once Dip foe, we knew he had gone guineos. Still, until now all his gulliness has been on record not reality.

1. Michelle Rodriguez: Although she shares her dislike of soap with Jones, the half-boricua/half-dominicana actually talks the talk and walks the walk. M-Rod's rap sheet rivals any gangsta rapper and her little black book contains more females' digits than LL. Due to her violent ‘tude and alcohol-induced joy rides the Lost actress has spent countless days behind bars. Armed with a criminal record and incredible B.O., M-Rod is the rowdiest bori to ever yell, "Wepa!"