[Si] TV

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Today is tax day-one of the most dreaded days of the year for many people.  I filed about a month ago and went and had my taxes done by a professional because I thought I was going to have a bunch of deductions due to all the medical problems I had this year.  But after going over all my receipts, the tax guy said that I didn’t have enough deductions and it was better to just file a normal 1040 form.  And then when he ran the figures he told me that I was getting back much less than last year because I was in a higher tax bracket.  And do you know what the effers advice to me was?  “Well, if you had a baby or bought a house you would have huge deductions and would get a lot more money back.”  It took all my inner goodness to not lunge across his desk and punch him in his smug face.  Oh sure, I live paycheck to paycheck but I’ll be sure to go out and get knocked up and buy a house so I can have bigger tax deductions you damn douche bag!  Needless to say I walked out of his office and did what any girl does-I started crying.  But then I started thinking about all the celebrities who have either gone to jail or owed huuuuge amounts of money for back taxes and I felt a little bit better.  Oh, and the half chocolate cake I ate helped too.

This year the big tax dodger was Wesley Snipes.  He was acquitted of federal tax fraud and conspiracy but found guilty of 3 misdemeanor counts of failing to file a tax return.  Just today U.S. prosecutors recommended a 3 year prison sentence and $5 million fine for cheating the government out of $41 million, so we’ll see what ends up happening to the “Blade” star.

Sports figures have also been hit by the tax man for avoiding to pay taxes.  Baseball player Darryl Strawberry didn’t get jail time, but was on house arrest for 6 months and had to pay $350,000 in back taxes in 1995.  Steffi Graf didn’t get hit by the IRS, but the German authorities did charge her with tax evasion and she paid 1.3 million deutsche marks and her father spent 4 years in prison.  The kraut government also got to Boris Becker in 2002 who avoided jail time by paying 3 million Euros and was placed on probation for back taxes owed to the German government.  Man, they don’t screw around!

Some other big tax cheats include Richard Hatch, the first "Survivor" winner who is still in jail for failing to report $1 million in winnings to the IRS.  He might have been a smart reality show player, but he wasn’t too bright when it came to filing his taxes. But

probably the saddest case of the IRS hitting a celeb with back taxes was when Willie Nelson was hit with a bill for $16.7 million.  The IRS confiscated and auctioned off his assets.  What is great though is that many of his fans purchased his things and then gave them back to him.  Willie also made an album called “The IRS Tapes” to support himself.  At least the man had a sense of humor about the whole thing.

If you haven’t filed yet you have until midnight.  Don’t avoid the IRS because they always catch up with you.  And if you don’t have enough deductions, just do what my tax man suggested and go get yourself a baby.  Hell, look at Brad and Angelina.  They are racking up the deductions!